Chapter 23: Pieces of Me

Bright sunlight shined directly into the bedroom and cascaded over a sleeping Natalie. It had been thirteen hours since the fight in the woods and still she hadn’t awakened. Blake was quickly growing panicked. The large bump on the back of her head had slowly started to diminish and yet she hadn’t so much as opened her eyes. He had been sitting up with her since getting her back to his place, watching her every second of the day.

And why not; he blamed himself for her predicament. Blake knew chasing her would only result in something like this but his wolf only saw his Natalie running away and needed to get her back. The silence in his home was broken with the sound of someone knocking on his front door and with an anxious sigh, Blake hurried down to answer. 

“Where is she?” Nick asked alarmed as he looked over Blake’s shoulder. He stepped to the side to let his friend in and Jessica hurried in with him.

“Is she hurt? Is she alright? Does she remember what happened?”

“Whoa slow down,” Blake spoke soothingly towards the blonde and nodded towards his staircase. “She’s in my guest bedroom, last door in the hall.” Without another word the two rushed forward and up to the second floor with Blake right behind them.

Jessica took a seat on the bed near Natalie and watched as her friend slept. Traces of dried blood matted the hair behind her ear and she gasped at Blake. “What happened?”

“She fell in the woods.”

“And you didn’t call us sooner? Has she seen a doctor?”

“I took care of her,” Blake growled defensively and exhaled a large breath as he felt the mutterings of his wolf under Jessica’s scrutiny. “I washed her up when I got her here; I guess I just missed that spot.”

“How long has she been like this?” Nick asked noticing the swelling on her temple.

“A few hours,” he shrugged as he regarded his best friend. “She saw something out there that may have scared her.” Nick nodded in understanding and knelt beside Jessica as she continued talking to Natalie and rubbing her hand. “She’ll be fine, I don’t smell…see any other injury on her. She’s just tired is all. I don’t think she’s slept much in the last four days and her body’s just catching up.”

“Have you told her parents yet?”

“Uh…yeah…her parents and I aren’t exactly on speaking terms Jess. I don’t even think they know about me – other than what Riley’s told them that is. They think I’m some homeless jerk with designs on their money.”

“Well you have to tell them! I know they are very worried about her!”

“Alright and how do you propose I do that? In your experience with Estelle what about her says she’ll be understanding about the stranger who rescued her daughter and just so happens to be the one they’ve been told is after her? I’d be locked up before I even told them my name. No, for now Natalie is fine here. When she wakes up she can make the decision about going home or not.”

Jessica spent the next several hours at Natalie’s side and the guys excused themselves downstairs to discuss the situation at length. “So what happened out there? You said she saw something that scared her. Was it you?” Blake nodded his head and dropped onto the sofa in his living room. “Dude!”

“I know. I told her to run, I couldn’t control myself anymore. Seeing Brody there, knowing the danger he’d put her in I just…I had to do something to stop him.”

“What all did she see?”

“Everything! She saw me change she watched him do the same, the fight, the mauling and Kibbles N’ Bits as you put it.”

“Damn…”

“It’s after that when she really saw me that she ran, fell and hit her head. I scared her,” Blake sighed and hung his head.

“Hence the real reason you haven’t called her parents yet; damage control.”

“I have to know that she won’t tell someone. Not just for my sake but for hers.”

“Well I’m just glad to see the both of you made it out alright. I can’t believe it was Brody all this time.”

“He wasn’t working alone. Honestly I don’t know what happened. There was an explosion and I just took the opportunity to get Natalie out of there. Someone helped me save her and I have a sneaking suspicion of whom.”

They heard footsteps on the staircase and turned in time to see Jessica making her way towards them. “I’m really worried about her. That bump on her head, she might need to see someone.”

“Blake has it all under control Jessica. Trust me after everything he’s gone through getting her back here he won’t risk anything happening to her now.”

She nodded and as she stepped closer, her eyes momentarly looking up the stairs. “I snuck some of her stuff out of her room,” Jessica smiled handing Blake the bag they’d brought with them. “Clothes and pictures and stuff nothing much but I grabbed her favorite sweater and jeans.”

“Thank you, she’ll appreciate this Jess.”

“You’ll call us when she wakes up?”

“Of course.” He watched as the two left and quickly ran back up the stairs to be at Natalie’s side. There had been no change in her status and he turned off the lamp beside her bed. Grabbing his diary he found a quiet place near the window and took a seat, ensuring he could see her from where he was.

The secret’s out and Natalie knows. There’s no easy way about this. I’m afraid I’ve really messed up this time. I’d hoped to tell her eventually in my own way but now it’s too late for that. She’s seen me for the monster that I am and now there’s no going back. The fear in her eyes when she regarded my form was enough to shatter my entire existence into a million tiny pieces. I wish more than anything I could have protected her from that.

Now I have to decide what I’m going to do. I can’t expect her to keep my secret as Nick has; she doesn’t deserve to have that kind of pressure on her. And after keeping it from her for so long I have no right to ask she remains quiet. To be honest I don’t know when I ever would have revealed to her what I am. How do you say to someone you care for that you’re some unheard of supernatural creature? ‘Hi, my name is Blake and on 3 nights a month I’m forced to live as a wolf’?

But listen to me go on about my situation when Natalie just went through the worst ordeal conceivable. On top of being betrayed by her longtime bodyguard and friend, she learned that I may not have been honest about the way I first met her. Dante revealed the fact that I’ve watched her. I can only imagine how bad her skin crawled when she saw those pictures. Fuck. This situation is even worse than I originally thought.

                                                                                                                                  -BF

Several more hours passed before Natalie’s eyes fluttered rapidly and she slowly turned over feeling her body reluctantly respond. Blinking against the bright light that beamed in through the curtains, she stretched and yawned. The soreness of her back made her wince as she sat up. The bell of the grandfather clock chimed and sounded unnaturally loud in the silence of the room, drawing her attention to it. Immediately her hand went to her head as the throbbing ache between her temples only increased as the clock announced the new hour.

“Hello?” she called, a frown furrowing her brow as she took in her surroundings. When she got no response she tossed her legs over the side of the bed, pushing back against the plush pillows behind her. Looking around, she became momentarily distracted by the elegant furnishings of the bedroom. She was lying in a large four poster bed, complete with silk bed hangings done in ivory and gold thread, matching the bedding perfectly. 

An armoire and a heavy oak dresser were pushed against one side of the room and two cozy overstuffed armchairs were angled towards a modern day fireplace on another. Large, plush carpets adorned the wooden floor and artwork covered most of the walls. “Blake,” she whispered and pushed off from the bed in search of him.

She didn’t have to go very far, as the door to the bedroom opened and Blake appeared carrying a tray of food with him. “Finally you’re awake,” he nearly sang as he watched her standing beside the bed with a confused expression on her face. “I heard shuffling and figured you’d probably be starving once you did so…” He sat the tray down at the foot of the bed and backed away from her, unsure of how close she would want him after everything that happened. “Are you…ok?”

“What?” she asked before dropping back to the bed.

“How are you feeling?”

“Super tired and my body’s sore.” She looked up at him as he took a step forward, her eyes locked on his face and studying it as if she was waiting for it to change.

“You just need to rest a little more. If you’d like maybe a hot bath might relax your muscles a little perhaps or I could make you some tea?”

“Tea would be nice, do you have…”

“Chai, yes; I remember.”

He smiled but Natalie didn’t return the gesture as she continued looking around the place trying to determine where she was. “Have you spoken with my parents?”

“Not yet; I figured that’s something you’d want to…handle.”

“Yeah it’s probably best.”

“But there is someone here to see you,” Blake announced with a smile. The familiar image of a fluffy, Champion bred Miniature Schnauzer trotted in behind him and hurriedly jumped onto the bed with Natalie.

“Caesar!” she exclaimed and quickly smothered him in hugs and kisses. “What are you doing here? How did you get out?” The Champion pet barked and Natalie laughed in spite of herself. “Yeah stupid question. You were never one for that gilded cage either were you? No! You always found a way out of your room and into mine. I’m so happy to see you,” she giggled as his tiny tongue went frantic against her face and she did her best to hold down the hopping animal as he tried to smother her with affection as well.

“He was scratching at the front door. It’s amazing how he was able to track you all the way across the city even with the marked territory and sage I’ve burned around us.”

“Caesar is VERY smart and even more determined, believe me. He’s never let the word ‘no’ stop him. It’s why he’s a champion in show four years running.” Caesar moved to the foot of the bed where Blake stood and started growling at him.

Blake smiled and took a step back as he watched him closely. “He’s pretty protective. Did you forget I’m the one who let you in here?” Caesar’s snarl turned into a loud, shrilly bark making Blake move even farther from the bed. “Ok, alright, I get it; too close to the…treasure,” Blake glanced at Natalie and sighed. “I’m gonna…uh go, um Jessica dropped off some clothes for you. There’s a towel and some unopened toiletries in the bathroom for you: toothbrush, soap, shampoo. You should go ahead and eat up while it’s hot and I’ll get you that tea and maybe a little something for your head? I’ll be downstairs if you need anything else.”

A few hours had passed and all was quiet upstairs. When she didn’t turn up around the dinner hours Blake had considered going up to check on her but she seemed to appreciate the privacy. Plus he’d told her where to find him and figured she’d come looking when she was ready. Hearing the wooden slats squeak above him, he turned towards the sound to find Caesar padding down the stairs and across the lounge towards the fireplace where he sat. Noticing the large brooding figure dancing in the shadows of the flickering light he began softly rumbling towards it. 

Very soon his tiny snarl became an echoed roar within the den and he lifted his head into the air watching the man carefully as he made his way towards the kitchen and his water bowl. Blake smirked to himself waiting for the animal to get near the door and growled. He watched as Caesar turned tail and tucked himself as far beneath his sofa as he could get. He laughed seeing the fluffy animal shiver and whistled for him to come back. “I’m sorry about that. But you started it!”

Blake reached out to pet the crown of the dog’s head but he jerked away. This time it was Caesar who growled and Blake immediately recoiled his fingers and placed his hands up defensively. “Ok, ok you win! I submit.” Caesar’s tail wagged merrily and he started again towards the fireplace with Blake.

“You love her,” Blake whispered as he rubbed his hand absently through Caesar’s fur. “I get it; trust me I understand that more than you could ever know. I’m no threat to her though, as you can see. Natalie is just…you should consider yourself lucky to be a dog. You don’t have to go through all this doubt and human emotion. Not only that, but she lets you sleep at the foot of her bed.” Caesar barked as if he understood and Blake laughed. “Exactly.”

“He was saying hello,” Natalie spoke gently as she made it to the bottom of the stairs. “And he doesn’t sleep at the foot of my bed, he takes the pillow beside my head.”

Blake stood and turned to face her as Caesar rushed over and begged to be picked up. “How did you sleep?”

“Fine I suppose.”

“For a while I thought you were out of it again. I wasn’t sure how well the medicine was working.”

“The headache’s gone and I’m starting to feel like myself again.” Natalie looked around the room as her feet slipped over the floor of his parlor making her way towards him in the den. “Where are we anyway?”

“My place; my real place. Nick bought my house after I disappeared and kept things just as I’d left them but I’ve been gradually updating it to give it a newer look; pulling stuff from storage and painting new canvases. The previous style was the old me and try as I might I can never be him again.” He paused as she dropped into the seat beside his arm and let Caesar down from her lap. “Are you hungry? I can make you some dinner or…breakfast,” he frowned noticing the time as 2:40a.m.

“No I’m fine,” she waved him off casually. “I noticed a lot of the work you have here isn’t like what you had at the other place. Less nature and more uh…human,” she stuttered noticing the nude woman hanging in the corner of the living room.

“Uh, yeah. I originally started with the human form and there’s nothing more beautiful in my opinion. But nature and the body are my two favorite subjects. I also dabbled a little in imitation and replication; my take on some of the most well known pieces of art. Then again what artist hasn’t? If-if it bothers you I can take it down,” he silently gasped realizing she must have been going over in her mind the number of women he’d had pose nude for him to complete the pieces. And even worse was the fact that he’d slept with each one.

“No Blake your art never bothers me; it’s beautiful.” She drew her legs up into the chair, looking down at the shirt she wore with a frown. “Bayside Fighting Llamas? What no hometown spirit?”

“When the home team loses constantly to superior teams with a lot more practice and way better athletes it gets kind of hard to root for them.” She pulled the collar around her nose and gave it a sniff, exhaling contentedly as she did.

“Lemme guess, you didn’t look?” Blake blushed as she alluded to an earlier incident between them and he shrugged. Natalie’s eyes wandered towards the bay doors and the large structure in his backyard and she stood to get a closer view. “What’s out there?”

“Uh…that is kind of a um project I’ve been working on. It’s still in its infancy so I…”

“Can I see it?” Natalie asked with her voice full of expectation to the point Blake was at a loss for denying her.

“Well it’s a little chilly outside,” he responded in reference to her clothing.

She smiled up at him and bounced energetically on her heels. “Gimme a sec and I’ll get changed.” When she returned, Blake casually strolled in front of her, opened the door and watched as she made her way out towards the backyard.

The cool, crisp night air whisked through the finely woven threads of Natalie’s oversized sweater as the wind swept her hair aimlessly across her face. And despite the trees blowing fiercely around them, the view of the snowy mountains off in the distance was all the more serene. She wrapped her arms around herself to delight in the warmth of her own body as Blake walked her beneath the weeping willow tree towards the greenhouse. On the way she noticed how immaculate his yard was kept. A manicured green top of grass cut to about two inches in height was perfectly outfitted with rose bushes and a variant of colorful wildflowers. 

She danced along the garden stones, humming as she played a mental game of keeping off his grass and Blake tossed her a smile over his shoulder. He opened the door to allow her to enter first and she took an immediate inhalation of air. A medley of smells wrestled within her nose blending together the wondrous fragrances of roses, lilies, daisies, jasmine and lavender. “Wow,” she beamed and fluffed a small bud of an African Violet. “This is amazing!” The scent of the place was intoxicating and she was enjoying the sight of so many flowers just as much.

Stopping beside a large array of lilies and hibiscus she glanced up at him and saw the huge smile on his face as he watched her delight herself with the colorful display. “Can we talk openly?” she asked and played with her fingers as he nodded his response. “That day we first met – when you saved my life, you didn’t just happen to be at the right place, right time; you were following me huh?” The question sounded more like a statement and Blake remained silent as he watched her walk the aisles of the greenhouse.

Natalie turned, timidly biting her lip as she regarded him, a shaky smile slowly developing on her face. “I saw your eyes that night. I mean at first I figured I’d imagined it because I was just so scared but, they WERE glowing.” He dipped his head and her smile fully formed. “And here I just thought you were an escaped mental patient.”

“I wanted to tell you Natalie. It’s just not something…”

“No I get it, I understand; I think.” She strolled slowly towards the bench near the back wall and took a seat, patting the spot beside her for Blake to join. “So you’re really a um…”

“Werewolf,” Blake finished her sentence and watched the wheels start to turn in her head. He could only imagine how that mental process was going; one he had been dreading for a while now. “I’m not dangerous; at least not anymore. I had a friend help me understand the depths of my abilities.”

“Nick?”

“No, not Nick.” He paused and waited on a cue from her before continuing. “When this first happened to me I was afraid. I didn’t know then how much my life would change but I knew it wasn’t something I wanted my friends or family to have to face so I hid. Now I wish I would have stayed invisible. At least then you wouldn’t have been hurt and no one else would have been placed in danger because of me.”

“Don’t say that. Hiding is never the right choice Blake.” Natalie rubbed her hands over her thighs and inhaled deeply. The awkward silence that now consumed the space between them made her question how well she actually knew the man sitting beside her. They had gotten to a place where silences were more comfortable and laughter came just as easily. But right now it all felt like a distant memory. “So what happens now?”

“I’m not sure,” he shrugged reservedly as he tried not to stare at the perfect way the moon lit her face and imagine touching her soft skin. “It’s completely up to you Natalie. If you want me to take you home now I will. I’m sure your parents have to be worried about you.”

“Yeah…right. I think you might be placing too much stock in them.”

“Actually I’m not. The day Brody took you they were on the phone with police immediately. Your father even organized a search party to find you.”

“My Dad,” Natalie smiled and lightly twirled one of her dark chocolate curls inherently. She sighed and released the hair and Blake watched it bounce back into place at once. “They’re not who I want to talk about right now though.” Instantly his mouth felt dry and he inhaled deeply as he waited for the other shoe to drop.

“Ok.” He simply replied and waited for her to continue.

“Have you ever been in love, Blake?” Drawing her legs into her chest she rested her chin on her knees and breathed in a troubled sigh. It wasn’t the question he was anticipating and it made him freeze as he heard it.

For a moment everything stopped and then he felt his heart beat faster than it ever had before as he thought she was referring to him. But just as it began to soar, it all came crashing down with the idea that the last 36 hours may have undone everything they’d started feeling for one another and he faltered. He glanced up to find her looking at him in anticipation but he had no answer to give at this point. 

He felt his head shaking with uncertainty. He didn’t want to say yes fearing she would ask who and he would be forced to admit his infatuation grew from a distant obsession to a profound affection for her and everything he knew her to be. He just couldn’t risk fracturing the already fragile relationship he’d imagined they had now by confessing to her. “I’m sorry,” she finally spoke breaking the silence he’d allowed to once again consume the space after the inquiry. “It’s not really any of my business. I shouldn’t have asked,” she whispered. 

Blake sat beside her, again letting the silence fill the room. It was foolish not to respond; it may have been the opportunity he’d been waiting for but he was too much of a coward to say anything. Everything inside of him prayed for the courage his written words seemed to have that was always missing in Natalie’s presence. He closed his eyes fighting back the demand for hesitation and let his lips move before his mind could over think and stop him again. “I have a confession,” Blake sighed and slid towards the edge of the bench a little. “This place,” he motioned with his eyes and stood. “It was started as a small token of appreciation for you.”

“Me?” Natalie pointed to herself in question. “Appreciation for what?”

“Helping me find my passion again. I don’t know if you remember the night you stopped by the waterworks building on a jog, I was sitting on the roof and you were heading to Ackerman’s. I caught up to you at the park…”

“It was the night you returned my necklace!” Natalie joined in as her memory was finally sparked. “I remember. What about it?”

“Well before I approached you I was watching you…for just a moment,” Blake added watching her eyes fall away from his briefly. Clearly she was thinking about what Dante said about the way he stalked her for weeks before finally speaking. “Anyway I saw the way you were with the flowers near the pond; one species in particular and I thought well maybe you should see for yourself.” He extended his hand for her to take and after a short pause she slid her palm into his and he walked her towards the back door of the greenhouse towards another section of the conservatory.

Natalie’s eyes opened wide as she was escorted into the room. Inside were dozens of growing, budding and blooming Moon flowers. Her hands came up to her mouth in surprise as she took in the sight and started forward. “These are my favorite flower!” she admitted and walked the aisles touching them excitedly. “And this is all for me?”

Blake nodded and Natalie ran towards him, diving into his arms as she quickly wrapped them around his neck and squeezed him against her chest. “This is the single most extraordinary thing anyone has ever done for me Blake, thank you.” In that moment Blake felt his chest swell with pride but more than that was the feeling of hope that what he and Natalie had been growing towards wasn’t completely lost. If he were honest with her earlier he would have shouted his answer from the tallest building in town. Yes, he HAD in fact been in love before and the only person to ever make his heart surge with that emotion was her.

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