Chapter 25: Don't Let Me Go

There are some people that bring out the worst in you. Endlessly pushing your buttons just to see how you will react and rehashing painful memories to watch you cry. While others bring out the best, cheering you on when you need it most, supporting you during a crisis and being that shoulder you need to cry on. And then there are those remarkably rare people who bring out the best. The truly addictive ones that effectively seep beneath your skin becoming a part of you until you can never again breathe free of them. They are the reason the sun shines so bright and make life worth living.

Like a devoted fiend you’re hooked on them until you can’t tell where one ends and the other begins. Natalie has truly become a fixture in my life. She makes me feel so alive that I'd follow her into the pits of hell to keep getting my fix. Last night was the most amazing I’ve ever felt since becoming the beast that I have; since ever. It was bad enough that I felt I couldn’t breathe without her but now she’s let me in. And as we lay entangled in one another’s arms I could swear when she moaned my name she touched my soul.

But I would never fit in her world; her parents don’t know me and already they hate me. Shit! This was a bad idea; the worst idea imaginable. Why did I ever open myself to her? Why did I let her into my sorry excuse for an existence? I should have just let her go. I should have been strong enough to watch her walk away from me and never look back. But fuck if I don’t wish I could have this; I need this. Why can’t I be selfish and take her? Do I not deserve happiness too?

No. Fuck. Of course not. Having her here is too dangerous and now with the price on my head. I fear being in her life will ultimately end tragically for her and I don’t want that. She has to go. Now. I can feel the possessive rumblings of this monster inside me begging to keep her locked in our bedroom forever. But I can’t do that to her. She is my beautiful Angel of mercy; the one who saw the good in me and reached into my soul to heal me. And as is true of all Angels, she must be free to fly.

                                                                                                                                -BF

Rubbing one hand over her sleepy face, Natalie began to stir and found herself drowning in the warm comforts of the thick duvet that covered her. Traces of Blake’s hands still tingled her skin in all of the places he touched and she found herself smiling as she thought about the many ways he twisted and turned her. God, the man really was an animal. 

Shaking her head a little, she swung her feet off the edge of the bed, stretched and stood up. The feeling of worn muscles pulled at her sides and all at once the visions of what she and Blake had done for most of the night flooded her thoughts causing a smile to form on her lips. Cool air danced over her bare skin and she shivered. Natalie looked around the room for a shirt or something else to cover up with and spotted a robe by the door. 

“Blake?” she called lightly and crossed the room to grab it. The carpets were soft, thick and luxurious beneath her and cushioned her feet muffling any sound she might have made. Slipping her arms into the soft, red terrycloth robe, she tied it tightly around her waist and frowned. It was too large on her and dragged on the floor behind her as she moved. Tugging the excess length around her hips, she cuffed the collar in her hands and smelled the fabric rich in Blake’s aftershave and sighed contentedly as she left his bedroom in search of her werewolf. My werewolf? She smiled to herself. Where did that come from? “Well it doesn’t have a bad ring to it,” she spoke softly as she looked around the outer room for the tall, muscular form that was Blake.

“What doesn’t have a bad ring?” His masculine voice asked towards her left. Natalie turned; a smile of welcome curved her full lips as she watched Blake enter through the living room door. He was carrying a small bouquet of moonflowers and smiling warmly in return as he held the bouquet out towards her. “I was kind of hoping to be back before you woke, but I guess I underestimated exactly how tired you were.”

“Aww Blake!” she exclaimed burying her nose in the center of the bouquet and inhaling deeply of the sweet aroma. Blake watched her with a chaste smile, delighted at the simple pleasure remarked on her beautiful face. She looked incredibly mouth-watering wrapped snug in his robe with her hair sleepily tousled around her face and shoulders. He trailed his eyes down her neck towards her barely hidden cleavage and groaned at the sight of her flesh peeking out from under her garment. The denim jeans he wore tightened slightly at his groin when her hand turned the bouquet and her arm caused the robe to open even more. 

“Thank you,” Natalie smiled, drawing his attention away from the naughty thoughts that had were running through his mind. Stepping up to him, she sat the bouquet aside and slid her arms around his neck. “They’re beautiful, I love them!” Blake cocked his brow as she rose up on her tiptoes and smiled. Gently she pressed her lips to his sighing contentedly as she felt him wrap his arms around her waist and pull her closer to fully enjoy the sweet kiss. It was filled with innocent affection and appreciation that blended remarkably well with his memories of her wanton behavior last night. 

Unable to stop at just one, he and Natalie made use of nearly every sexual position known to man until the covers found themselves on the other side of the room and the pillows were long since lost to the floor. It surprised him most how aggressive she became somewhere after round three. He thought for sure she would have been exhausted but she matched his stamina at every turn making it a night to remember. He remembered how glowing her nude body looked tangled amongst the sheets as she slept peacefully beside him and sighed. “You’re very welcome Natalie. How did you sleep?” he asked when she finally broke away from the kiss. “Are you hungry?”

She nodded and collected the bouquet from the counter, cradling it between her breasts and drawing his attention like a moth to a flame. She giggled softly, stepping around him to find something to put the flowers in and breaking the mesmerizing effect her breasts had on him. “I slept great and yes, I’m starving!” She responded dropping the flowers into a vase and slid onto a barstool waiting for him.

Blake started into the kitchen and Natalie gasped as his shirtless form passed her, eyes fixed to the marks on his back. “Blake!”

Instantly he remembered the claw marks he’d been trying to hide and turned his back from her. “It’s nothing.”

“Is that…from your attack too?” she asked already knowing the answer to the question but the shock of seeing his body so marred from the wolf scared her senseless.

“Well there are probably some there because of you too from last night,” he grinned and watched her cheeks become a bit rosy. Blake pulled a skillet from the cabinet beneath the sink and poured a flour mixture into it as he listened to Natalie humming contentedly behind him. “You know you do that in your sleep?” he asked and heard a breathy laugh follow. “It’s really cute.”

“Did you sleep at all last night?”

“A little. I was more concerned over the fact that tonight is the first night of the full moon,” he paused and flipped the pancakes as he turned to look at her face. She seemed to understand where he was going and frowned slightly at the thought of having to see him go through a change again. 

“So does that mean you’re leaving?” she asked, playing with her fingers as she watched him cook. He didn’t answer right away. Instead he finished up the pancakes and motioned for the dining room and she started in front of him. Blake placed a steaming plate in front of her and took the seat beside her.

“Well I’m not sure really. Do you remember the time I left town for a little while?” she nodded her head gently, taking a bit of her pancakes. Instantly she recalled it was at the same time of the previous month’s full moon and everything started falling into place. “Well I met someone; the person who turned me actually and he helped me control my change. On nights of a full moon I should be able to keep myself human but I haven’t really tested it yet.”

Finally, he was rewarded with a soft “oh,” and Natalie took a sip of her orange juice. “And that means that the wolf from the woods could make an appearance tonight?”

“If things don’t go as I hope, yeah. It won’t be safe for you here. The best thing for you will be to get someplace secure and stay inside with the doors bolted and windows locked until dawn.”

Natalie chewed her lower lip, remembering the frightening creature from a few nights ago as she continued eating her pancakes. “I don’t understand; why wouldn’t I be safe here? It didn’t seem to want to hurt me then.”

“And I also had someone else to focus my rage on that night as well. Had Brody not been there…there’s no telling what I might have done to you Natalie and I don’t want to take that risk.”

“But what if I did?”

“I won’t let you regardless of what you want. If there’s even the slightest chance of you getting bitten…” he trailed off thinking of the consequences of such a task. Deep down some part of him wanted it; his wolf half desired to make her like him to keep forever. But his human side couldn’t do it. There was no way he could condemn her to his lonely existence.

“That would make me like you?” she asked, her brow furrowed as she tried to fathom the idea. At his silent nod, she paled and nodded. “Oh. So how much time do we have?” she asked, finishing the last of her breakfast. Blake pushed his plate to the side and looked up at the clock on the wall with a shrug. Natalie licked her lips as she looked at the shirtless man seated beside her and felt her body heat up a few degrees thinking about his touch. “You know we could make the most of the time we have left.”

Blake stared at her in disbelief as she squirmed in her chair, her clit pressing against the hard wood and making her moan softly. He could smell her arousal in the air mixing with the sweet scent of syrup making his mouth water. Closing his eyes he tried to block out the erotic sight of her wriggling about but could hear her moan every time she moved and felt the chair rub her just right.

His breathing deepened as he stood from his chair, pulling her up with him suddenly feeling the craving of his animal. With savage haste, he roughly tore the robe away from her shoulders and leaned forward tickling his lips up and down her neck. 

Natalie quickly worked on undoing his pants as she shimmied from the terrycloth and Blake lifted her effortlessly onto the table in front of him, his mouth slipping over her breast. Licking, sucking his tongue guided the curves of her nipple as her legs wrapped around him and he entered her hard and fast. “Oooh,” she purred in his ear as his arm gripped her tightly and he thrust himself forward, plummeting between her thighs. 

Throbbing and pulsating inside of her, his head fell back and she leaned forward, wrapping her arms around his neck as she swayed her hips and took him deeper. The table shook beneath them and thoughts of cracking the grass beneath her butt briefly crossed her mind as the plates and stemware clinked around them.

Possessing her lips, he pumped his hips frantically, her teeth closing on his bottom lip as he grunted. Hot breath poured over his face as she gasped and he felt her muscles tighten on him as she yelled his name. “Blake,” caressing his face gently she watched as he started to lose it, eyes closed, chest heaving his lips parted to say something but the only sound he made was a guttural cry of pleasure as her walls clenched him tighter.

Blake again pulled out and stepped back quickly searching the table for something to contain his release. Tugging a napkin from beneath a nearby plate he pumped his shaft in his hand vigorously, spilling a copious amount of his seed into the cloth before falling over onto Natalie’s shoulder, sighing heavily against her. “You’re…insatiable,” he laughed beside her ear and Natalie giggled beneath him, pulling his head up to give his mouth a sweet kiss.

“I don’t hear anyone complaining.” He fixed his pants around his hips as she rubbed her hands up and down her naked thighs with a smile.

“You’re right, I’m not,” he grinned and tugged her away from the table, lowering her to the floor. Natalie brushed her hand through her hair as he pulled away and Blake’s eyes fell on the dark purple mark on her wrist. “I’m sorry,” Natalie looked confused momentarily before looking down to where his eyes were fixed. “I hurt you,” he growled at himself and stepped away.

Natalie rubbed the spot gently and smiled. “It was a heat of the moment thing last night, Blake. It’s ok.”

“No it’s not,” he replied sternly. “It’s never ok. It’s what I’m most afraid of doing while I’m around you. The animal has very little self control and I fear that in that state, I’d do something that would forever tarnish you; or worse. And it’s why…”

“What are you saying?”

“You have to go home Natalie. Besides the fact that I may not be in full control of my actions tonight, your parents haven’t heard from you in days; they have to know you’re alright. Come on, you should get dressed so I can drive you home.”

“You have a car?”

“Natalie, I have THE car,” he smiled cockily thinking about his restored Shelby parked out in his garage. It took less than thirty minutes for them both to get dressed and they were heading down the mountainside towards Valley Ridge. Blake parked a block away and walked her up to the house, waiting until she disappeared inside before turning and heading back home.

Seeing no one in sight as she entered, Natalie called for her parents and watched as her Dad was the first to storm from the living room to the left. They rushed forward simultaneously and he lifted her from the ground, hugging her tightly against him as a flurry of emotions overwhelmed him. “God, you’re back; you’re safe.” Estelle moved in and wrapped her arms around her daughter as well, her husband refusing to let go as he felt her shudder against him.

Finally pulling away he looked down at her and wiped the tears from her eyes. “We were so scared Natalie. You have no idea what it’s been like trying to find you. Are you hurt? Who did this? What happened? Where were you?” he fired off one question after the other as he guided her towards the living room. 

Estelle motioned for Winston and he entered the room, awaiting for his next command as the family took seats on the sofa in front of the fireplace. “I don’t know exactly. Brody came to pick me up, he said you didn’t want me jogging in the rain and next thing I know we were in the woods and I was being locked into a room.”

“Brody!?” Arthur growled and jumped from his seat. “I’ll have his fucking head.”

“Arthur, language!” Estelle shrieked causing her husband to glare at her confused and annoyed.

“Winston, get Detective Mercer on the line for me please and let him know that Natalie’s returned.”

“Right away sir,” the butler replied as he dialed the number to the station and reported exactly that.

Arthur returned his attention to his daughter, smiling when she looked up at him. Natalie could clearly see the fret lines that had been pressed into his face from worry and the red eyes she assumed from crying although she’d never seen her father cry. Her mother’s appearance was the opposite. While her eyes appeared slightly puffy, they were covered with concealer to reduce the appearance of age. It was always harder telling how she felt. “You said this was Brody, do you know where is he now?”

She shrugged and Arthur knelt to the floor in front of her. “I just know we were in a cabin one day and a barn a few days after that. It was dark, it smelled like pine and horses but I didn’t hear anything that I could identify. When he took me out there we drove past the old sugar mill, crossed some tracks but I didn’t recognize the area after that. I think we were still in Cresting Heights but I don’t know for sure.”

“You don’t have to worry sweetheart. We’ll find him I promise. Did he tell you anything about why he took you?” She shook her head no as he continued, moving again beside her; he pulled her into his arms and held her. “I’m sorry Natalie. If there was any way I could have known…”

“I’m ok Daddy.”

“No it’s not ok. To have something like this happen to you by someone I trusted to take care of you. I was blind Natalie and I am truly sorry about that ignorance. I love you more than life itself. I can’t tell you what I would have done if I didn’t get you back. How did you get away anyway?”

“Blake…”

“That violent grifter from the masquerade?” Estelle gasped not trying to hide her disgust as she heard the name. “Well I’m not surprised he’s involved after what he did to poor Riley. That boy had to have his wrist set, luckily for him it was just a sprain but it could have been much worse.”

“Blake didn’t do this, Brody’s the one who kidnapped me; Blake saved me!”

“I don’t know what upsets me more. The fact that you are on a first name basis with that vagrant or that you’re defending him when we have it on good authority he’s dangerous,” Estelle waved her hand at Winston in a flashy motion for her to retrieve their guest from the other room. 

When Riley appeared around the corner Natalie immediately jumped up, even more enraged than from her mother’s accusations about Blake. “‘Good authority’? Since when do rapists, liars and cheaters rank higher on the humanities list than artists, good Samaritans and benevolence?”

“Natalie I’ve been so worried about you. You have no idea how much stress Arthur, Estelle and I have been under trying to find you,” Riley postured, moving in closer for a hug which Natalie immediately jerked away from.

“Don’t touch me! I have no idea where your hands have been!”

“Wow, Babe, really? That hurts. But I won’t take it personally; you’re just a little confused and maybe disoriented after your ordeal so it’s understandable you want to lash out at me. I should have been there to protect you as any loving fiancé would.”

“Excuse me?” Natalie asked her mouth agape as she stared at Riley in disbelief. “You want to run that by me again?”

Motioning towards the box of papers sitting on the coffee table, he smiled up at her when Arthur pulled a card from the stack and handed it to her. “Riley told us all about the engagement sweetheart. He’s been here every day since you went missing to help bring you home safely.”

“Engagement?” Natalie stood in shock as she read the announcement. Trying desperately to get her mind to work but all she saw was anger as she stared at the wedding announcement. Looking up, she caught the sinister smirk on Riley’s face and before she knew what happened, her hand slammed quickly to the side of his face. “How could you? If you think for a second I’d ever let you…”

“NATALIE!” Estelle gasped and knelt beside Riley where he fell. “What on earth has come over you?”

“What? Me? I was kidnapped and you’re asking me what’s wrong? Are you serious? EVERYTHING IS WRONG MOTHER! You are walking around here as if I was late coming home from the store for a pack of gum or something! You haven’t even once asked me if I was ok! On top of that you invite Riley here and are planning a wedding that I obviously am only the bride for and accuse one of my friends of being some sadistic vagabond and you want to know what’s wrong? My life is wrong and always has been!”

“Natalie Christine Silverman, I don’t know who you think you are talking to but I am your mother. I will not be spoken down to like a commoner. You weren’t raised like that and you will respect me while you’re living under my roof. You have no idea what I went through when you disappeared! And Riley has done everything in his power to help get you back and does not deserve to be treated like that. Now you apologize to him.”

“You really don’t get it do you?” Natalie asked glaring at her mother as she waited to hear her apologize for her outburst.

“It’s ok, Estelle, she’s just a little out of it. This is what I was telling you. It’s been this way since the night of the masquerade.” He replied and tried to take her hands in his but again she pulled away. “Natalie I’m not mad at you about what that guy did, how could I be? I’m only angry that I got there too late. If he would have forced himself on you…”

She turned towards her father with tears in her eyes as she listened to her ex continue spewing lies. Her head shook as if she could somehow swat away his voice with the refusal to hear it but nothing worked. “Just stop!” she shouted and rushed from the room.

“What the hell is wrong with you Estelle? We just got her home after God knows what she’s been through and you are treating her like some guest in your home! You’re the one out of line! She’s your daughter, not one of your tea buddies from the club and certainly more important than planning a wedding! Natalie is an adult, stop treating her like some lost little girl who can’t think for herself!” Estelle shrunk beneath her husband’s fury as he berated her in front of their company and she was at a loss for words looking into his angry gaze. “Natalie!” Arthur yelled and started forward.

“Please, allow me,” Riley hurried after her, pushing the door open as she tried slamming it behind her. Leaning against it he watched as she threw herself onto her bed, rubbing a hand across her face as she tried to wipe away her tears. “What did you expect was going to happen? I told you you’re mine; did you honestly think I would give you up without a fight?”

“You told me you slept with Alex as a way of getting me to leave you and when it worked you spent the rest of your time trying to get me back. What sense does that make?”

“I made a mistake; it was a selfish thing to do I know and I’m sorry,” he shrugged and slowly sauntered to where she sat. “But in losing you I realized that it was the dumbest thing I’ve ever done so yeah I’ve been trying to win you back.”

“I’m not marrying you.”

“Not according to the announcements; you like them? Estelle helped me design them. She’s been pretty excited over the whole thing. It’s the only thing that could distract her from worrying so much when you disappeared. But now that you’re back, she’s got her hands full again I’m sure with planning the blowout wedding of the century!”

“I said I’m NOT marrying you!”

“Natalie, we don’t need to revisit that little conversation we had about Blake again do we?” The very mention of his name made a smile appear on Natalie’s lips until she realized that Riley had messed things up completely as far as her parents were concerned. There was no way either would accept him after what Riley said about him. “You and I will be together and by the end of this term, we will be man and wife. We already have your parents blessing.”

Natalie looked up at him as if seeing him for the first time and nodded. “You’re right Riley.”

“See, I knew you’d come around.”

“I was being foolish, but I feel better now.”

“Good. Estelle’s calling a few caterers she knows and checking on menu items and would like some input. And I’d love for my future wife to have the wedding of her dreams so we should maybe go down and help.”

“Sure, of course.”

“And Arthur’s calling the detective that was in charge of your case. I’m sure they’ll be sending someone over to talk to you about everything that happened. They’ll find Brody and Blake.”

“Good, I just need a moment to compose myself,” she smiled stiffly.

“Whatever you need Talie,” he leaned forward to kiss her cheek and Natalie flinched when his lips brushed her skin. “I’m glad to have you back.”

“There he is!” Estelle sang seeing Riley re-enter the room. “How’s my daughter?”

“Just a little cold feet, she’s fine now though and Natalie said she’ll be down momentarily to help you with planning.” Arthur paced a moment, watching Estelle and Riley interact again, seemingly only concerned about the upcoming nuptials.

“What the hell is wrong with you people? Estelle, our daughter is upstairs right now probably crying her eyes out after going through some horrible life changing ordeal and you’re down here acting as though it’s just another day? No wonder that girl is so turned around!” he remarked, tossing the box of announcements to the ground with force before excusing himself from the room to check on his daughter. Those two seemed too preoccupied with a wedding Natalie didn’t seem to even know about and he was determined to get to the bottom of whatever was going on.

“Natalie? It’s Dad,” Arthur knocked and waited for his daughter to ask him inside. “Look I just wanted to talk to you about your engagement and I wanted to know where your head was. I don’t know if it was my imagination or not but I could have sworn you and Riley had ended things. Baby I know you’ve been through quite a bit these last few days; maybe longer given our earlier conversation. But I want you to know that you really shouldn’t feel pressured into doing anything you don’t want to. I only want you to be happy. Natalie?” he knocked again. Receiving no response, Arthur pushed his way into her room and looked around.

His eyes instantly fell on the opened window beside her bed and he quickly rushed over. “Natalie? Natalie!” He turned to head outside when he saw the note sitting on her bed. Dropping to the mattress, he read over the first line and realized his daughter was gone.

“Blake? Blake it’s Natalie! I need help!”

“What happened? Are you ok?”

“No! I don’t know! I just left my house. My parents are planning a wedding and Riley’s there and no one believes you’re not a predator and I don’t know where else to go I need you to come and get me, please.”

“Slow down Natalie, relax just tell me where you are and I’ll be there.”

“I don’t know um, the QuickTrip gas station near 7^th and Lane.”

“Alright just stay where you are, I’m coming.”

“Please hurry.”

Dad, Mother,

If you are reading this, it means I am gone.

Mother, I’m sorry I could never be the daughter you wanted and became some huge disappointment to you. But I cannot continue living in the shadows or pretending that my life is anything but some giant puppet show with my strings being pulled in multiple directions. I am a grown woman with no control over what goes on in my life and I refuse to play a part in whatever plans you have for me any longer. You never listen to me or concern yourself with what I want. I don’t know if this was how you saw things going when I was born but it’s not the life I want to live. Riley is a lying scumbag who cheated on me with my best friend on my birthday and does nothing but manipulate others to bend to his will. He is not the man I want to marry and not someone I need in my life.

Daddy if you’re reading this, I’m sorry for everything I put you through. Please understand this has nothing to do with you but just something I felt was necessary. You once told me that to grow up was to know who you were and be the person you wanted to be. For me that person is not a ballerina. She’s not the gem of society to shine on special occasions or decorate the arm of some entitled asshole. She’s a writer, a humanitarian, a leader, a best friend but most importantly she’s still your daughter. I know you probably feel that as a parent you’ve somehow failed me but that could not be any farther from the truth. It’s because of you I know who I am now and who I want to be. I know you’ll want to look for me but I ask that you give me some time. The moment has come for your little girl to spread her wings and fly but know that wherever I land, you’ll always be in my thoughts.

With love,

~Natalie

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